"I just wanted to feel special"

The past few weeks at our church the middle school, high school and adult church have been going through a  "Tough Conversations about Sex" series. Now I know some parents think that middle school is too young for this or that you are just not ready to have that conversation with your kid. Well, statistically kids are exposed to some kind of sexual content by the age of 8 years old. Eight years old!! Can you believe that? The average age of kids having their first sexual encounter is 16.4. I have two daughters and I want my daughters to know what God says about sex. Not just that it was meant for a husband and wife or that you can get a disease if you have sex out of wedlock like the schools preach. I want my daughters to value themselves enough to know that they don't have to do anything to feel "special" because they are special. Just like the video above, this girl had a low self-esteem about herself and allowed satan to tell her that in order to feel special she needed to give her body to some boy.

I mentor middle school age girls and it so saddens me to hear them put themselves down. To think of themselves like the girl in the video did. That they are not pretty enough, smart enough, worthy enough for anyone to love them. They are not special. As a parent, I want to make my girls feel special, feel loved. But, I know that girls can only feel affirmation about their self-esteem from the only one whose opinion even matters, God! We as parents must direct them to scripture CONSTANTLY, God's truth. He considers us "fearfully and wonderfully made." He loves us above all others.( Ephesians 2:4,6) We are "chosen, a royal priesthood, holy, belonging to God." (1Peter 2:9) We are "accepted in the beloved." (Ephesians 1:5) We are "precious, honored and loved." (Isaiah 43:4) We have "God's power working through me." (Ephesians 3:7)

I could go on and on about the truth of how God feels about us. I know this is a difficult thing for girls especially. Even at my age I too still struggle with this. Just think if we helped our daughters see this truth early on in life, what a difference it could make.

I know that no one wants to have the sex talk with their child, but I'm telling you that if you don't they will hear it elsewhere. And you know what? It won't be God's point of view and it may be too late. Please parents take the time to talk to your kids. Affirm them in God's love. Show them how incredibly important they  are to the One True King!!

And for all you ladies out their, gather these verses for yourself. Do NOT let the enemy temp you into thinking you need this affirmation from a guy to make yourself feel special and loved. God is the only  one we can truly rely on in all situations. For your convenience, I've added a few more verses below. Write them on your hearts!!

I am a child of God (Romans 16-17)
I am greatly loved (Ephesians 2:4,6)
I have been set free (Romans 8:2)
I am accepted in the beloved (Ephesians 1:6)
I am given glorious grace lavishly and without restrictions (Ephesians 1:5,8)
God dwells in me & I am lovely(1 Corinthians 3:16-17, 6:19-20, Psalm 84:1)
I am precious, honored, and loved (Isaiah 43:4)
I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:13-14)
God is greater than the one in the world (1John 4:4)
I can be strong and have God's power (Ephesians 6:10)
God plans to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11)
When I am weak, I am made strong by God's perfect power (2Corinthians 12:9-10)

In Christ's Love,
~Tina Foster~

Loving fall and my hubby

My husband  knows how much I love fall and anything sweet. Since I went gluten free about 3years ago, it's been hard to find good gluten free sweets. Oh, but my hubby is wonderful. He goes out of his way to make me happy. He made the most amazing cinnamon pancakes that are gluten free and have cream cheese icing to top it off.  I thought I might have just died and gone to heaven. So, because my husband is the best, I made him write down the recipe. He altered one from the Internet, all for me. So, here it is. I pray you'll enjoy it and that you have someone special to make it for you. Hey, if not God loves you and wants you to make them for yourself. So, spoil yourself and enjoy these mouth watering pancakes from heaven. By the way he used gluten free bisquick for me, but you can use regular bisquick if you are not gluten free.

Spending time with God!

"Spend time with God" So many people say this is the way to have a relationship with Jesus. What do you hear when someone says spend time with God?

"I don't have an hour to spend in a room, at a table reading my bible with a highlighter and commentary, so I guess I won't be able to have a relationship with God."

I hear this all the time. It dawns on me that kids today don't know how to spend time with God. They hear that if they don't spend hours sitting in one spot reading half the bible and memorizing 100 verses that they are not spending time with God. Wrong!! I believe that we think that if we spend 10 or 15 minutes that we aren't good Christians because we can't sit still with God. What we don't know is that when we take those 10 or 15 minutes with God that he can stretch them into 30minutes or an hour.

This happened to me. When I hear someone say that they spent hours in prayer time with God, I think, " Wow! I must be a terrible Christian for not being able to spend this much time with God." Then I decided to do what I could, so I made a plan to spend at least 15 minutes a day in solitude, with my bible, alone with God. Before I knew it I was spending a half hour with God, then an hour with God. Just the other day I was doing a bible study and reading Gods word and praying, that when I looked up at the time I had been spending over 2 hours with God. How amazing is that!

I recently told one of the middle school girls I mentor that spending time with God will reap such wonderful blessings on her life. I told her to start out making a habit of spending 15 minutes a day with God in solitude. That means put the cellphone away, turn off the tv, go away to a quiet place you can be alone, and be with God. Start out with a verse. Read the verse, then read the chapter that the verse is in. Take time to summarize this verse in your own words. What does this verse mean to you? How can you apply it to you life? Pray that God will teach you something through this verse this week. Meditate on this verse.

She came back to me later and said that she not only spent 15 minutes with God, but actually spent 45 minutes with God. God met her there in her quiet time with him.

My heart soared for her. How great our God is that he meets us in our quiet time with him. He does want to have a relationship with us.

I couldn't think of a better lesson for her. She learned first hand why we need to spend time with God and how we start.

Prayer is the number one way to have a deeper relationship with God. When we spend time with God in his word and talking to him, he uses his word to speak to us. More times than I can count, God has used a verse to teach me about how to live or act at a certain moment in my life. It's through my quiet time and bible study, that I'm able to recognize God's voice.

I was recently given a visual reminder that we are only on this earth a short time. On average we will live on this earth about 80 years. We have about 80 years to make a difference for God. Our purpose in this life is to bring God glory in everything we do. In order to be in God's will, we have to know what God's will is for us. In order to know what God's will for us is, we need to be in relationship with God. He will show us his will for today. I know so many of us, me included, want to know God's plan for our future. I'm learning that God is only going to reveal enough of his plan for us to get through today. And you know that is really all we can handle. His ways are so much higher than our ways. We can't handle the entire picture. So, we must stay in relationship with him so we can see his plan for us and to be able to give God glory.

So, there you go. The secret to what your purpose is on this earth. The mysterious question that has been asked for centuries has now been answered. Now, are you going to seek a relationship with God and fulfill your purpose?  

Ephesians 2:8-10
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not of your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of your works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

In Christ's love,
~Tina Foster~

"You don’t know God is all you need until God is all you’ve got."

On the first night of middle school life groups, fourteen girls showed up thirsty for community and Jesus. I'm so blessed to be given the chance to minister to these girls. Some of these girls don't know Jesus is what they need. At their age I didn't know it either, until one day my eyes we're  opened. That's when this quote from Rick Warren happened to me, "you don't know God is all you need until God is all you've got." 

At 12 years old my life had been turned upside down. My father divorced the only family I had ever really known. My step-mother was like a real mom to me. I was told to leave the house I grew up in. Leave a step-brother and step-sister that I've known since they were born. I wasn't allowed to contact them at all. At 12 this is devastating. The next thing I know, my father is  involved with another woman and we are moving about 200 miles away to a place where I didn't know anyone. 

I needed God and he was there for me. I didn't know that was what I needed at the time. I missed my family like crazy. I was in another new school trying to fit it. In a place where I knew no one. In an area of Virginia where I had no "home." God called my name. I was a baby Christian and he walked with me. As a teen and a new Christian I was in desperate need for a savior. He was always there for me. I guess at the time I couldn't see it. As I look back on that time I can see God's hand on my shoulder guiding me through all the rough patches. I didn't have a church community or Christian friends to help me. I definitely didn't have a small group leader to talk out my fears and struggles with.

I believe God uses our struggles to help walk with other people. I can see that now in my life as he has called me to walk with middle school students. I know the struggles they are facing. I understand that need to be accepted and I know the desire to have someone who will listen and give advice based on Gods Word. I've been there. 

That's the whole point of going through struggles, I believe. We've been there and survived. I couldn't have done it without Jesus. God was truly my savior. He kept me from making some truly bad mistakes. I believe he allowed me to go through these things so I can one day become a small group leader, a mentor, to teens. Wow! Isn't that amazing! 

I may be able to make a difference in someone else's life. Rick Warren also says this, "How does God want you to be a witness this week to the unbelievers in your life who are hurting and need hope? He wants you to say, ‘Pain really got my attention. Let me tell you what I learned. I learned that I need people in my life when I’m going through pain. I learned that God is all I need. ‘ "  We are called to be a witness for God. To tell people what God has done in our lives. It's not our job to convince them to trust God, but to tell what he's done for us and how we found out that he was all we needed. I pray every day that I can be that witness to these girls. 

Last night we wrote down what a woman after God's own heart looks like. The answers just kept flowing out of these girls. Patient. Kind. Loving. Loyal. Forgiving. Caring. Selfless. Brave. Courageous. Thankful. On and on they came. Then I asked the question,"which ones did you struggle with the most today?" I want them to have a starting point. We don't know where we are going unless we know where we started. This is their goal. To be women after God's own heart we have to start where we struggle the most and ask God to change us day by day. 

Pray for these girls as they go, each day, asking God to make them young women after God's own heart. What a difference you can make in their lives by just praying for them. Lift up your voices in praise for their desire to be women after God's own heart. Pray for their struggle as we trip and fall. But knowing that these girls make bible study a priority in their life, is an inspiration to me. I too want to be a woman after God's own heart.

In Christ's love,

~Tina Foster~ 

It's not about me!

You know I wasn't going to write about what's been going on with me lately because I thought, "Oh this sounds like a woe is me kinda complaining session." But then I read my devotional today. The verse was Psalm 103:3-4 which says, “He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies." The devotion talked about confessing sin on a daily basis, giving it to God, receiving his forgiveness and moving on. So here I am confessing.

Chronic pain is something I deal with on a daily basis. Whether it is from my arthritis, migraines, or from the inflamed sciatic joint in my lower back. Every day I wake to dealing with another day filled with worries: How much pain will I have today? What will I be able to get done today? Will I be able to handle the pain today? I make the same mistake every day. I make it all about me.

I tend to forget that it's not about me, it's about what God can do through me. Some days I rant and rave because I feel like if I weren't in so much pain I could do so much more. I know God has the power to heal, so why doesn't he? Doesn't he know how much more I could do for him if I didn't have to constantly deal with this pain? You see my problem now?

I am so thankful for God's word that speaks truth in my life. Usually for me it comes through someone else. More times than I can count it comes through a devotion I'm reading. That's what happened today.

This week we've been going over our serving value at church that says, "it's not about me." I've listened to the other stories of what God has been teaching others about this value. It didn't hit me until today when once again I woke to horrible back pain. I haven't slept good in three nights and I was back to my ranting to God. I started thinking about how I was going to manage this when our small groups start up with my middle school girls. How would I be able to lead these girls when all I'm thinking about is the pain I'm in. Then I read my devotion and the verse psalm 103:3-4. God will take care of me and give me his love and mercy if I can let go of my sin of worry. He will do great things through me. I know my purpose here on earth is not done yet. I love the verses in Jeremiah 29:11-14 that say, "For I know the plans I have for you... They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me."  So I pray and I look for God in every aspect of my life.

I know God could heal me and take away all my pain in an instant. He chooses not for his reasons that I don't understand, but in each day I'm grateful that he gives me everything I need to get through this day and complete the plans he has for me. No, I may not get my to-do list done, but I am able to accomplish what he wants me to accomplish. I pray every day I will wake up thankful for this day, pain or no pain. I want to complete the purpose he has for me on this day. I try not to worry about tomorrow, granted that is a monumental task for a worrier like me. So each time I feel myself slipping into the sin of worry, I stop and pray, "God, what would you have me do today? How can I serve you today?" Okay don't think I'm a saint or that I do this perfectly. I just confessed I had an all-about-me moment today. But in my brokenness I realized I cannot do this on my own. I HAVE to come to God each day, each hour, each minute, each moment. I cannot do this on my own strength. If left up to me, I would have given up a long time ago.

I'm thankful that I'm surrounded by a community of believers that are willing to pray for me at the drop of a text, no questions asked other than how can they help. I'm glad that I have the truth of God's word to comfort me. I'm glad that I don't have to do this without him. I'm glad he gives me the privilege of serving. I'm glad that it's not all about me. It's about how we can best serve him by letting go of our brokenness and allowing him to work through us. Amen for that. If I allow Him to lead there is no room for me to fail. I'm working in his power. So, no, it's not about me! It's about Him working thorough me!

In Christ's love,
~Tina Foster~

Crafts for College Fund

I've been a stay-at-home mom now for 4 years. In 2010, God gave me a clear message that I needed to be at home for my girls. One child was heading into middle school and the other into the 4th grade. I've worked from the age of 15 so this was a very trying time for me and, at times, it still is. I love being home when the girls get off from school and I love being able to serve my family in this way. I love that fact that I am not as stressed or that my attention is not torn between them and my job anymore. God, in his love and mercy, has given me a chance to be the mom that I've wanted to be. I'm not always good at it, but I do continue to learn each day and rely heavily on God's guidance. Being thankful for the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom is something I work at every day.

If you know me at all, you will know that I am domestically challenged. I hate cooking, cleaning, and laundry. I am learning how to do these things with a loving and grateful attitude. Still there are days when I think to myself, "why am I here other than to be a maid?" Oh, I know that I am more than that to my family, but you know somedays it just doesn't feel like it. So, I come up with ways to keep off the boredom. I love to volunteer, lead a table at the women's bible study, and I LOVE to craft.

God as gifted me with a creative mind. I love love love Pinterest. So many ideas for my mind to jump off of. I love crafting. I've been dabbling in many things over the years. I create jewelry, paintings and crafty items. Now, I know I won't get rich doing these things, but they do help me to relieve stress and put a little extra money in my kids college funds. So, if you are interested in helping a fellow mom/parent out, please see my page above called "Crafts for College Funds." I'd love the opportunity to create something special for you. It is a fairly new page, so I'll be adding new things frequently. If you see something that you like, just seen me a comment or email me.

Awesome teens walk with God

I am so blessed to be a small group leader to a great group of middle school teens. If you had told me 10 years ago that I would be mentoring teens, I would have thought you were off your rocker. God in his greatness and sense of humor has lead me to be a middle school leader to girls.

I've worked with kids for over 16 year, but most were under the age of 11. God started me out in the nursery taking care of infants even before he blessed me with my own two girls. About four years ago, I heard the calling to go into the middle school room at our church.  At the time, I lead a group of fourth and fifth grade girls. I was leading the fifth graders up into the middle school room for their introduction week and there is when I heard the Holy Spirit tug at my heart.

Since I came to Christ at 12 years old, I felt a strong calling to go into the middle school room to mentor young girls. I did not have anyone to mentor me growing up. After I turned my life over to Christ, we moved away from my church. Since my father was not a Christian, we did not go to church. I had no one to help me walk this life out with God. No one to help guide me in my relationship or to keep me accountable. It made life really hard for me, but I always knew God was there for me. So when I heard the Holy Spirit call me into the middle school room, I was nervous and excited. I wanted to do this right.

I didn't go into the middle school right away. I think God was preparing me though. Some circumstances kept me from going into the middle school room until about 2012. I moved up with my then sixth graders. Some of these girls I've had since kindergarten. From the minute I stepped in with them I felt scared, but at home.

I know what a huge pivotal point this time is in their lives. This is a time where they are trying to figure out who they are, where they fit in, who they want to be, and who they want to hang around
with. The biggest thing that drew me to the middle school was that they were doing small group meetings outside of church. These were like bible study meetings. I jumped at the chance to do one at my house.

My first year of leading a small group we had about four girls, which I was happy with considering any more could have be overwhelming not to mention scary. It was a great year. They were new to the small group idea as was I. I had a great co-leader who had been doing this for quite some time and taught me a lot.

Now I am ready to start my third year of small groups. I'm so excited. The group of sixth graders I originally ushered into middle school are now eighth graders. Over these last two years, I've seen them grow spiritually, emotionally and physcially. God draws them to himself more and more each day. I am so blessed to be a small part in their journey with God.

I just had ice cream with three of the girls from my small group. Listening to them talk about school
and how they are keeping themselves in the midst of where God wants them is a healing balm for my soul. Seeing how they really care about their relationship with Christ more than their relationship with kids at school is so refreshing. They don't care if they are popular. They don't care if they stand out. They don't care if they are labeled "the goody good girl." They find comfort and rest in who God made them to be. As their small group leader, as a mom, as a Christian, as their friend, I am so proud of them all.

This past year I had fifteen girls coming to small group. I don't tell you this to pump myself up at all. I tell you this because I am in awe that God would trust me with fifteen girls to help mentor and walk out this journey of life. As I start a new season of small groups, I'm again in awe that God would trust me with these girl's lives. They have become "my girls." They call me Mama "T" now affectionately. They text me when they have issues going on that their parents just can't help with. They confide in me and ask me to pray for them. I consider it a great privilege when they do. I've never stopped
praying for them.

I don't know how long this season of being a middle school leader will last, but I am soaking it all in while I can. God in his goodness and mercy and, yes, even his humor has put me with some great girls. And you know what? I'm loving every minute of it! Thank you Jesus!


In Christ's love,
Tina Foster