As I look out the window at the snow falling for the first time this year, I'm thinking about how some people around here may see this snow as a disappointment. They see it as a nuisance and a pain. They see it as something to sludge through. It's interesting how something can be a beautiful, wonderful thing to one person can also seem like a nuisance, ugly mess to someone else. Today God is teaching me that disappointments are a part of life, but that we can choose to see the joy and positive side of things.
We all have days where we expect things to go a certain way, a person is supposed to act a certain way, or we should bounce back from injury quicker than we think. When those things don't go our way, or people disappoint us, or that injury doesn't get better the way we hoped, we feel disappointed and see things in a negative way. That's me today. My day didn't go as planned. People didn't do things that I thought they should. My health is not getting better like I thought it should be getting. So here I sit thinking about the negative. As much as I want to, I cannot get over the negative thoughts. They have captured my thoughts, my feelings, and my actions. I hate it. I can hear satan laughing at me. That I hate too.
Each day I remind myself that my God loves me even when people disappoint me, even when things don't go the way I thought they should, even when my health gets worse, even when my day just seems to be the worst day ever. I have a choice to sit and get bitter over the things that disappointed me or I can choose to find joy and look for positive things in my life. Joy is different from happiness. I'm not happy about the disappointing things in my life, but I can choose to see the joy that God has blessed me with. As a human being this is not easy and I cannot do it alone.
I'm learning I am in dire need of God to help me with this. I cannot do this apart from him. Apart from him, I want to give up. I want to have a pity party. So, no I cannot do this alone. Just because I choose joy doesn't mean that my disappoints will go away, that my life will be perfect. I also cannot flip a switch and make myself joyful. I need God.
Today God gave me a piece of joy. It's snowing. I love a good snow day. It always reminds me of when my girls were little and we'd go outside all bundled up and play in the snow. We'd go to the top of our small hill in the back yard and put the sled down and take turns sliding down the hill. Now the hill is not a massive hill, in fact it's pretty small in most people's mind. But for us, for me, it was the best hill for sledding. I can still hear their laughs, their falling over in the snow making snow angels, their giggles as they throw a snowball at each other and at me, their beautiful smiles as they decide how to make our snowman this time.
I can be sad too because my girls are not little anymore, I'm not really healthy enough to go down a hill today, and the girls are not really into our little hill for sleigh riding anymore. But you know what? I'm still going to choose to remember the joy we had and the joy we can have. I'm thankful they are home with me. I'm thankful they are safe. I'm blessed my oldest can sleep off her cold she has been suffering with. I'm thankful for hot coffee and Oreo cheesecake. I'm thankful for the foot warmer I call my dog. I find joy in sitting here watching God blanket my yard with this beautiful thing called snow!
So I pray that today whether you like snow or not take a moment to find some joy in what God has blessed you with today! And don't do it alone, pray for Gods help. His joy can overcome our disappointments.
In Christ's love,
~Tina Foster~
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